Mommy's "Owie"

Emmett has been very concerned with his mommy's "owie". As far as my health is concerned, we've told Emmett two things. First, Mommy is sick. And second, Mommy has an owie that we should never touch.

He often stands outside my bedroom door when it is closed and repeat over and over to himself and others, "Mommy sick?" When he gets to come in and visit me, he runs into the room and shouts, "HI!" and then immediately locates the owie and points it out.

My "owie" is the catheter bag that I carry with me everywhere. I'll get up a few times a day and sit in the livingroom or kitchen, and the owie follows me. I carry it around the house in a white tub that serves two purposes-- it guards against leaks and also does double duty occasionally as a barf bucket.

When the catheter was very new, Emmett once tried to grab it. I shouted at him and jerked his arm away. His feelings hurt, he went running down the hallway until his little legs collapsed under him. He cried like his heart would break, and when he came back I explained to him that we never EVER touch Mommy's owie. He has been obsessed with the owie ever since. He always points to it and is very cautious to walk carefully around it. Sometimes the level of his understanding amazes me.

Today I was feeling relatively well and switched to a leg bag for a while. I left my bed, went into the kitchen without my regular ball and chain, and sat at the table to visit with my mom and aunt, Vonnie. Emmett looked at me, saw that I wasn't carrying my owie, and disappeared down the hallway. When he returned, he was carrying the plastic bin with him. He brought it straight to me and handed it over, his little face concerned. "Owie?" he asked, and then backed away carefully. My precious little boy.

He knows my owie is very important, and he knows I am never without it, so he brought it to me.

I adore my sweet boy. He makes my life so much better! I love his hearty laugh, the way he carries on entire conversations of gibberish, I love that he walks around the house singing and dancing all day long, I love that he constantly repeats words and phrases and is so experimental with language. I love that he likes to give sloppy upside-down kisses at bedtime, and how he has patiently resigned to sitting next to me instead of on my lap at story time. I love the way that he runs to my room to make sure I'm there and to visit me all through the day or to show me a toy or a new little dance or song he has invented. I love that I can hear him singing, "I love Mama, hm la la" on and off all through the day. I love sitting on the bed with him to watch Elmo and I can get in a few cuddles and extra kisses in the few moments he holds still. I love the way he runs around the house meowing at the cat. I love how worried he becomes whenever he sees someone else who is "so sad" and I love that if you ask for a hug he comes running straight into you with his arms wide open. I love that he makes chomping sounds when he eats, says, "AHH!" with a grin after every sip from a cup, and "mmm!" after each bite. I love listening to him talk to himself and sing songs in his room when he wakes up in the morning or after a nap. I love the way he has to run everywhere he goes and his sweet obsession with cars and playing outside.

He is everything that keeps me going each day. I just can't get enough of my angel child and in the brief time that I get to spend with him every day, I just want to soak up the sight and smell and sound of him and revel in what a perfect child he is. I feel as though I am the most blessed mother in the world.